


Problems With Secrets

by Containsaddedsuga



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Background WooSan - Freeform, Canon Compliant, Hurt Kang Yeosang, I was going to make this seongsang but it went into a different direction, Kang Yeosang-centric, Sick Kang Yeosang, Sickfic, Stressed Kim Hongjoong, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:41:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29098983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Containsaddedsuga/pseuds/Containsaddedsuga
Summary: The universe is really trying to ruin his life. Yeosang isn’t particularly a strong guy, in terms of his immune system; but he isn’t too weak either. Minus his minor asthma problem, he’s a healthy twenty-year-old guy. His asthma had really never bothered him. When he was younger, his condition was a bit more severe but after building his breathing control with all the training he does, it’s gotten a lot better.He doesn’t need to use his inhaler as much, and it’s been so mild that none of the members even know about it. Yeosang hasn't had any major attacks for so long he actually forgot he had asthma. However, he forgot about one thing: getting sick.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 49





	Problems With Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what this is. I like whump fics so I wrote this at the start of quarantine and didn't finish it till now. I made Hongjoong sound so mean and I regret it but it is what it is... I hope it's enjoyable.

Yeosang wakes up and he knows it's going to be a bad day. He can feel the beginnings of a headache in the back of his skull. His throat feels different but tries to ignore it. He’s already behind in the choreography and needs the most practice he can get. As he tries to move his body out of the bed, he’s already dreading the rest of the day. Yeosang woke up early enough that he had time to take a shower before leaving for practice. 

After he took the shower, Yeosang felt much better, more refreshed. He finishes getting ready and goes into the kitchen. Yunho and San are already awake, and Yeosang makes a light breakfast for himself. 

“Is Wooyoung awake yet?” San asks Yeosang with his mouth full. San and Wooyoung have the habit of waking the other up, they really can’t be apart from each other. Might as well change the roommates Yeosang thinks as he replies to San, shaking his head. San smiles and happily skips over to the room where Wooyoung is sleeping. 

As it gets later into the morning, the members start filing into the kitchen. By now, Yeosang is nursing a warm cup of tea, trying to help with his throat. His head felt a lot better after taking the shower, but with the loud voices of his members; the headache is starting to come back. Yeosang looked for medicine earlier, but he couldn’t find any. The blonde didn’t want to worry any of the other guys by asking for medicine, so he planned on buying it by himself after practice. 

“Okay, guys. The manager is here, let’s go.” Hongjoong calls out to everyone. They all file out of the dorm, getting into the van outside the building. Yeosang was lucky to get the window seat so he was able to lean his head against the surface. He closes his eyes as the moving scenery makes his headache even worse. 

It isn’t a long ride to the company building, but the bumps during the ride didn’t help with his head at all. Once they got to the dance studio, Yeosang went to his locker and looked if he had any medicine. Finding none inside, Yeosang doesn’t want it to get even worse, so he decides to ask Seonghwa. 

“Hey hyung, do you have any pain killers? My head started hurting in the car.'' Yeosang lied a little, knowing that if he said he woke up like this; the older man would get mad at him for not saying anything earlier. 

Seonghwa looked at the younger with worried eyes. “I’ll see if I have any, and I’ll ask around from the others” As the older man moves to walk away, Yeosang grabs his wrist first. 

“Wait hyung. If you don’t have any it’s fine. I don’t want the others to worry even more.” Yeosang really hates being the one who drags the group behind. He was already struggling with the new choreography, he didn’t need to waste more of Yunho’s time re-teaching him the steps. 

Seonghwa understood how the younger felt, so he didn’t say anything more. Seonghwa checks if he has any medicine, but he doesn’t. Now that practice has started, Seonghwa notices how Yeosang is breathing a little harder than usual. Knowing that he can’t really help the stubborn member, he just watches from afar. 

The practice runs through fine. Hongjoong must have noticed Yeosang slacking off a bit, and starts to complain about his performance. Seonghwa couldn’t help but feel bad for the younger since he knows Yeosang isn’t feeling his best. But he had to keep the younger wishes of not saying anything.

-

“Yeosang! Focus on the music” Hongjoong yells out, clearly not having Yeosang’s performance. The leader has been watching the younger the whole practice, calling out the mistakes he keeps making. 

But Yeosang couldn’t help it as his limbs felt weak and heavy. His head is throbbing and it’s probably the start of a cold. The cold is really not helping with his body movements. Yeosang hasn't been sick for so long, he completely forgot about how being sick triggers his asthma. At this point, his chest is starting to feel uncomfortable. Once the music stops, signaling the end of practice; Yeosang rushes to the door. 

“Yeosang wait” Hongjoong calls out to the younger. Yeosang had no choice but to turn back and listen to his hyung. “Yeosang, I hope you know why I wanted to talk to you” he starts and Yeosang nods, looking at the floor of the practice room. 

“I honestly don’t know what’s happening, Yeosang. You’ve been behind this whole week. The comeback is getting closer and I need you to try harder” Hongjoong scolds him. 

The younger one isn't having it today. Yeosang knows he’s been struggling with the new choreography lately, but getting the scolding right now isn’t helping with the sickness. “I’m sorry hyung, I’m trying my best. I’m not feeling too well today” Yeosang told the truth, but Hongjoong wasn’t having it. 

“Yeosang, stop making excuses. I’m trying to help you improve'' Hongjoong 's voice is harsh in his ears, Yeosang’s emotion is ten times worse because of the cold and he can’t stop his eyes from watering. His head is starting to hurt even more and all he wants to do is rest. 

“I really don’t feel well today hyung I-” Yeosang starts to walk away but Hongjoong stops him.

“Yeosang will you listen for once? Do you want to keep disappointing Atinys?” The leader’s voice is loud and clear in the now silent room. The words are repeating in Yeosang’s head. He felt hurt by what Hongjoong said to him. 

“What?” Yeosang couldn’t contain his anger. They all knew his confidence was a sensitive topic. He couldn’t believe Hongjoong would bring up something like that. Tears flowed down his face as he looked straight into Hongjoong’s eyes. Seonghwa walks up to them, trying to stop the fight. “Thanks so much for caring about me” Yeosang angrily spits out, and storms out the room. 

-

Yeosang is so thankful that his schedule ended after the morning dance practice. He rushes out of the building without even waiting for anyone. He’s standing next to the company building, holding the wall for support when he suddenly feels a throbbing headache and his legs go weak. His eyes are still closed as he feels a hand touching his shoulder. Seonghwa is there looking worried.

“Yeosang? Are you okay?” Seonghwa gently supports the younger off the wall. Yeosang feeling better in the arms of his hyung.

“Yeah, I’m okay hyung. I’m just going to go back to the dorm and rest.” Yeosang reassures the older.

“Go buy medicine before you go home. I don’t think anyone is going to be at the dorm until later, so call me if you need anything, okay?” 

Yeosang is already feeling better, knowing that Seonghwa is worried about him. He nods to the older, and Seonghwa runs back to the building, not wanting to be late for the next thing on his schedule. 

As Yeosang is walking to the bus, he stops for medicine and lunch to eat with the pills. He waits for the bus and it arrives shortly after. He usually didn’t mind riding the bus, but this time, the bumps are killing his head. 

He gets back to the dorm and showers before he eats. After feeling clean, he eats the lunch he brought, along with the medicine for his cold. Yeosang cleans up after himself and goes to rest on his bed. It didn’t take him long to fall asleep.

\- 

Hongjoong feels super guilty. He didn’t know why he said that to Yeosang. He’s supposed to be a leader that takes care of his members, not hurt them. The leader sighs as he packs up to leave. Dance practice ended a couple of hours ago, and he is just in the studio working on new tracks. He decides to call it a day and go back to the dorm to apologize to the younger. Even if there’s a lot going on in his life right now, Hongjoong shouldn’t have lashed out on his members. 

He checks his phone if there are any updates on his mother. 

A few days ago, he received a call from his older brother that his mom is in the hospital because she fell down the stairs. Hongjoong has been too busy to stay with his mother, but he’s been visiting her as often as he can. His brother has been staying with their mom, along with his father so at least she isn’t alone. 

When Hongjoong gets back to the dorm, all the lights are off and Yeosang isn’t in the living room. Hongjoong puts his stuff down and puts the chicken he brought for Yeosang in the kitchen. He walks to Yeosang’s room, sees that the door is closed, but he knocks anyway. 

“Yeosang? Can I come in?” Hongjoong waits for a second; receiving no reply, he opens the door. The younger is sleeping soundly on his bed. Not wanting to disturb him, Hongjoong closes the door and goes to his own room. 

-

Yeosang wakes up a little after Hongjoong left the room. He’s a pretty light sleeper and woke up when he heard someone come into his room. Yeosang was still pretty mad with Hongjoong, but mostly he’s more disappointed in himself. He should be better, he needs to work harder. 

He feels much better than this morning, so he decides to go practice more since it is only three in the afternoon. 

He hoped that someone, maybe Yunho or San, is still at the studio, practicing. But his hopes went down when he saw that the lights were off and no sounds were coming out of the room. Yeosang goes into the empty studio and wastes no time. He stays there for more than three hours, nonstop dancing. The only breaks he took were occupied by him practicing his vocals.

By the end of the session, he was drained. Seonghwa is calling him home, so they could eat dinner together. He rushes to clean up the studio, not wanting the rest of them to wait for him. 

The bus came fairly quickly, but it kept getting stuck in traffic. It’s already been 30 minutes since Seonghwa texted him. Yeosang is rushing to get home but the long bus ride is making him carsick, and not to mention the headache from this morning is coming back. He definitely overused his voice, his already sore throat is hurting even more. His muscles and limbs feel like they weigh a ton. 

He’s walking blindly now, his senses fading in and out. His breath starts becoming heavier, quicker like he is not able to get enough oxygen in. Yeosang felt faint but he didn’t want to collapse in the middle of the street. 

Somehow, he made it back home. Yeosang fumbles with the code by the front door. But once he makes it in, he falls to the floor by the door. Everyone is already by the dinner table, eating. They all heard the front door opening and knew it was Yeosang coming back but didn’t see him walking out after the door was closed. Hongjoong decides to go check up on Yeosang, but he didn’t expect to see the younger collapsed on the floor. 

Yeosang is breathing rapidly, still conscious, but he isn’t saying anything. When Hongjoong yells and calls out for him, the younger doesn’t reply. Everyone comes rushing to the door because of Hongjoong yelling. 

“Yeosang! What happened?” Jongho asks Hongjoong who is the first one to see him. 

Hongjoong just shakes his head, still trying to calm Yeosang down. 

Yeosang pants, still trying to get air into his lungs. He needs his inhaler, but it’s in his room. He tries to get up, but his legs are too weak. The room spins and he falls back down into Hongjoong’s arms. 

Yunho notices Yeosangs actions “What do you need?” He crouches down to Yeosang’s level to hear him better.

Yeosang is still gasping for his breath, but he tries to get the words out. “Inhaler… I need my inhaler. It’s in the last drawer of my bedside table” Saying the few words took more energy than it should have. Yeosang slumps down once more, and closes his eyes, feeling drained. There is still an uncomfortable feeling like he can’t breathe. 

-

Yunho rushes into Yeosang’s shared room. He digs into the last drawer in the side table. He can’t help but to think, does Yeosang have asthma? Why did he not tell anyone?

He rushes out after getting the bag with the inhalers. 

Once Yunho hands Yeosang the bag, the younger takes a blue inhaler out and uses it. He releases the medicine and starts breathing in slowly. 

Everyone visibly sees Yeosang relax, and they all let out a breath of relief. Seonghwa helps Yeosang up, moving the younger into his room. He left Yeosang to rest in his room, while he went out to deal with the others outside. 

“I’m a horrible person” Hongjoong says once Seonghwa walks into the living room. They are all seated on the couch, in awkward silence. Seonghwa pats the younger’s shoulder trying his best to make him feel better. 

“I’m not saying what you did was right, but don’t beat yourself up over it. Yeosang will understand, but please apologize to him, treat him with something nice?” The eldest gives the leader suggestions, but he knows the younger will do the right thing. 

“Yeah, I brought him chicken today, but when I tried to give it to him, he was sleeping so I didn’t want to bother” Hongjoong tells Seonghwa, feeling even more guilty. “I should have noticed something was wrong, and I definitely shouldn’t have said that to him” He rubs his eyes, stressed out about so many things. 

“Hyung, please don’t overwork yourself okay? You can talk to us about things, we can help you with work too.” San gives the leader a hug, his hugs always the stress reliever. 

Hongjoong leaned into the hug, but before he could relax, a phone call disrupted him. He excuses himself and walks out of the room. 

“Anyone know what's wrong with him?” Seonghwa being the oldest, always knowing something is bothering Hongjoong. They all agree that the leader is worried about something. Seonghwa being a doting member, eyeing Mingi from across the room. The rapper has a guilty look on his face, and Seonghwa knew something was up. 

“Okay, spill Mingi. I don’t care if Hongjoong told you not to tell anyone. I know he talked to you about it” 

Mingi eventually confesses everything, from Hongjoong's mom in the hospital, and him not being able to go visit. The environment in the room dimmed, the members feeling even more guilt for not knowing the troubles their leader is dealing with. 

Seonghwa sighs, “I’m going to check up on Yeosang and give him some medicine.” He walks to leave but turns back “Also, if anyone has any other life-threatening condition, please tell me and don’t collapse by the front door” He chuckles and continues to Yeosang’s room. 

\- 

The next morning, Yeosang woke up still feeling sick but definitely better than yesterday. He winced just thinking about having to confront the rest of the members. The blonde gets out of bed and walks into the common room. San is sitting by the counter while Wooyoung makes breakfast. 

“Hey Yeosang, you feeling better now?” Wooyoung turns from the stove, worried flashing across his face. 

Yeosang nods, “I’m good now, I’m sorry-” 

Wooyoung cuts him off, “save your apologies for the table, I’m making us all breakfast so we will eat together”    
Yeosang nods again, going back to wash up, and waits for the food to be ready. 

-

With everyone finally gathered around the table, Yeosang breaks the silence. 

“So, I do have asthma, and I’m sorry for worrying everyone. I forget it acts up when I get sick, and I pushed myself a little too hard yesterday” He apologizes for giving his bandmates a scare, not mentioning anything about the reason why he pushed himself harder. 

“I also have something to say” Hongjoong turns to look at Yeosang, clearly showing the comment is towards the younger. “I let my emotions get over me and I said some really bad stuff to you. I wanted to say I’m really sorry and I will work harder to be a better leader.” Yeosang sees how sincere Hongjoong is, and he knows he can’t stay mad at the older forever. He accepts the apology, giving him a hug. 

“I would also like to say something else'” Seonghwa looks to Hongjoong before continuing his sentence. “I want everyone to be more transparent about their problems. We’re all here to help you. And things won’t escalate to where it was if you weren’t so stressed” Seonghwa made it seem like he’s talking to the whole group, but they can all tell it’s directed towards Hongjoong. 

The leader frowns, knowing that he has to come clean. After he explains the situation, only Yeosang is surprised by the news. Hongjoong looks at Mingi in suspicion, the other being the only person who knows about it. He doesn’t mention it now, opting to confront the other later. 

“Now that everything is clear, everyone get ready and Yeosang you go back to bed” Seonghwa gets up from the table, walking away before he can hear Yeosang’s protests. 

Before Hongjoong leaves, he decides to go talk to the younger privately. He knocks on the door before walking in. 

The vocalist is curled up in his blankets, watching videos on his phone. “Hey Yeosang”, the younger looks up before sitting up. Hongjoong sits by the end of his bed before he starts talking “I just wanted to say I’m sorry again.” 

Yeosang nods and smiles “Hyung, I told you, I’m not mad anymore. And especially now that I know how stressed you were, I forgive you” He tells the leader honestly. 

“I know you forgive me, but I wanted to be clear that I know my actions were uncalled for, and you can tell me if I ever go too far” Hongjoong still feels guilty, “I never want to lash out like that again, no matter how stressed I am.”

Yeosang moves closer to the leader, pulling him into a hug. He squeezes the olders shoulders “I know hyung, I’ll speak up next time. I promise” Yeosang pulls away from the hug and Hongjoong ruffles his hair. 

“Okay, Yeosang. Get some rest, make sure you eat, and take all your medicine.” The rapper leaves the room, seeing Seonghwa waiting for him by the front door. 

“Everything good?” Seonghwa asks him. 

Hongjoong nods and they make their way to practice. 


End file.
